Created MJMS page, with PayPal button.
Updated printisbetter books page.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Danglehorn Arrives August 1
Ka’s mother is Matriarch over all the elephants in the Valley, and one day Ka will be Matriarch herself. Ra is a rhinocerous whose family has been chased from their home. On the banks of the Cold River grow the thistles and thorns Ra and his family like best, but the elephants regard this land as sacred. Ra and Ka must learn to overcome their differences and work together to protect their land and food from an even greater threat.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Upcoming Events
August 13, 1-3pm, Paul Juser will be signing his book, "Danglehorn" at the Green Toad Bookstore, Oneonta NY.
Call For Submissions: Use the contact form for Laugh at Yourself First submission guidelines.
Call For Submissions: Use the contact form for Laugh at Yourself First submission guidelines.
Friday, August 26, 2011
printisbetter 5
Read "The Salvation Shark," and more short fiction, scripts, and very little poetry at Laugh at Yourself First.
printisbetter.com
The rental car was paid in advance for a weekend in Columbus visiting hipster craft shops, photographing murals and graffiti and checking out galleries. In line in front of us at Budget were a couple that were not allowed to rent the car they'd already paid for. The slurring attendant was smug about his refusal. The previous weekend, when my friend arrived to collect the moving truck he'd rented from Budget, they didn't have it for him. When it came our turn to get our keys, Budget wouldn't give us our car either. The moral of the story is, if you rent from Budget Auto, you probably won't get your car. Instead we were told to call a number from the website to be refunded. The attendants didn't have this number, and I didn't have time to look it up for them. Instead, my ladyfriend and I drove a white pickup truck that was bigger than any vehicle I'd ever driven but a Uhaul (Uhaul was happy to give me the truck I'd rented).
Around a wedding reception Saturday night, we saw as much of High Street as we could, so keep an eye out for printisbetter bookmarks. On Sunday, we made a second attempt to eat at North Star Cafe, having come the night before a few minutes after closing. When we stepped inside, we thought we'd gone through the wrong door to a takeout line, and stepped back out to go for table service. We were stopped by a man that claimed to be an employee on his night off, and didn't want to see us leave due to a line. He offered to take care of our entire food bill. I assumed this was the same joke that was frequently played at the restaurant I worked at, but at least we now knew we'd gone through the correct door in the first place.
Inside, the man in the blue shirt was in the kitchen talking with the cooks and line workers, so I mentioned his offer when it was our turn to order line. Turns out we'd spoken with the owner, not an employee. Everything but our alcohol was free, I ordered an Anchor Porter. Our server tried to persuade me instead to enjoy an homemade ginger ale, which would also be free. I hate ginger ale, and I love Anchor Porter, but I accepted both at his urging. The ginger ale was homemade, after all. It was very good ginger ale, but the beer was better, and the food was delicious. I didn't have any cash to tip, and the receipt had no place to tip by card. Gratuity was included, so we bought a flat bread pizza to eat at the hotel later. If you go through Columbus, make sure to try Northstar Cafe. If you're here with me in Binghamton, you can get printisbetter bookmarks at the ART Mission Theater, RiverRead Books, or by emailing me at printisbetter.com. Thanks for reading.
-Paul
printisbetter.com
printisbetter.com
The rental car was paid in advance for a weekend in Columbus visiting hipster craft shops, photographing murals and graffiti and checking out galleries. In line in front of us at Budget were a couple that were not allowed to rent the car they'd already paid for. The slurring attendant was smug about his refusal. The previous weekend, when my friend arrived to collect the moving truck he'd rented from Budget, they didn't have it for him. When it came our turn to get our keys, Budget wouldn't give us our car either. The moral of the story is, if you rent from Budget Auto, you probably won't get your car. Instead we were told to call a number from the website to be refunded. The attendants didn't have this number, and I didn't have time to look it up for them. Instead, my ladyfriend and I drove a white pickup truck that was bigger than any vehicle I'd ever driven but a Uhaul (Uhaul was happy to give me the truck I'd rented).
Around a wedding reception Saturday night, we saw as much of High Street as we could, so keep an eye out for printisbetter bookmarks. On Sunday, we made a second attempt to eat at North Star Cafe, having come the night before a few minutes after closing. When we stepped inside, we thought we'd gone through the wrong door to a takeout line, and stepped back out to go for table service. We were stopped by a man that claimed to be an employee on his night off, and didn't want to see us leave due to a line. He offered to take care of our entire food bill. I assumed this was the same joke that was frequently played at the restaurant I worked at, but at least we now knew we'd gone through the correct door in the first place.
Inside, the man in the blue shirt was in the kitchen talking with the cooks and line workers, so I mentioned his offer when it was our turn to order line. Turns out we'd spoken with the owner, not an employee. Everything but our alcohol was free, I ordered an Anchor Porter. Our server tried to persuade me instead to enjoy an homemade ginger ale, which would also be free. I hate ginger ale, and I love Anchor Porter, but I accepted both at his urging. The ginger ale was homemade, after all. It was very good ginger ale, but the beer was better, and the food was delicious. I didn't have any cash to tip, and the receipt had no place to tip by card. Gratuity was included, so we bought a flat bread pizza to eat at the hotel later. If you go through Columbus, make sure to try Northstar Cafe. If you're here with me in Binghamton, you can get printisbetter bookmarks at the ART Mission Theater, RiverRead Books, or by emailing me at printisbetter.com. Thanks for reading.
-Paul
printisbetter.com
Thursday, August 4, 2011
printisbetter 4
Read “Doom City,” and more short fiction, scripts, and very little poetry at Laugh at Yourself First.
printisbetter.com
Am I the only rational person hoping Michelle Bachman is nominated for President? For starters, she’s the only candidate I’m confident President Suckerpunch can beat. Can you imagine the crazy Bachman and her closeted nancy-pants husband would unleash trying to 'pray away the gay' for the whole country? John Cleese and Michael Palin couldn’t write better comedy. A popular social media site I belong to asked me to sign a card for the President’s 50th. I told him I still can’t understand how legalizing whaling would help end whaling, and that I was happy the Gulf oil spill happened to prevent him from opening oil drilling on the East Coast. Even though I promised to vote Nader in 2012, the President's staff still asked me to volunteer. Anyone out there looking for Nuge to dip his toes in the political waters again? I still have the hat, and I can grow the moustache again.
If you’re here with me in Binghamton, Talia Moore put together a wonderful art & theater expo last weekend. I was there to table for the ART Mission and watch my ladyfriend in a panel discussion on the local art scene. The event featured open auditions and headshots, and I was able to catch up with many luminaries from my theatre past. Muchof event seemed made up as it went along, but considering this is exactly how I learned to produce plays, I applaud the method. Many of the attendees were children, and I couldn’t tell if the event was aimed toward them or toward the adults, but there was invaluable information for all. I hope to see this become a yearly event, and I will be happy to lend any support I can. Water Under Attack, my new collection of short stories, is available now at printisbetter.com. Ten stories for ten bucks, you can’t beat that with a stick. Trust me, I’ve tried. Thanks for reading.
-Paul
printisbetter.com
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Laugh at Yourself First: Here in This Sorrow
Read "Here in This Sorrow," and more short fiction, scripts, and very little poetry at Laugh at Yourself First.
printisbetter.com
I hope no one accuses me of not writing due to laziness. Last weekend, my character wrapped in The Demon Messenger, and 95% of the movie has been filmed. Iamhorror.com is still planning a Halloween release, so look for us on iTunes and Netflix, and I'll keep you posted on the big screens that will have my weirdbeard. I was in this movie because I wanted to be in a monster movie, but as the story took shape, it became such a part of me that I practically forgot about the monster until the weekend it was on set. Between movie and Day Job, only the power of cupcakes was keeping me awake at that point. I was only meat in this movie, but getting to watch another writer's process was great for me. Thanks to Doug Bush and Ted Nappi for letting me be a part of this.
If you're here with me in Binghamton, you'll probably recognize many veterans of the local stages, including my great friends Brian Nayor and Dave Merrill. As you've noted, I'm a notorious misspeller and worse editor, and when Dave was in several of my plays I gave him a new name in almost every program. I hope he's forgiven me, because he was always one of the most fun people to have on set, and it was great to work with him again. I was also able to face off against my childhood hero, Marquis de Blood of the horror-rock band, Others, and Horror-Punks.com who has been kicking me in the chest or hit me with his guitar since his punk band, Abalienation, back when I was a little kid. printisbetter.com is active now, and Water Under Attack, and Salvation Shark Vol 2 are both nearly complete and should be online in a few weeks. Thanks for reading.
-Paul
printisbetter.com
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